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Wednesday 19 December 2012

Been around the world

Wednesday, 19/12/2012 - 189 A.D.

First off, sorry for naming this post after a Lisa Stansfield song, but the title is oh-so appropriate. It was yet another quiet day today, so I'll spend most of this post writing in summary of the trip, rather than focusing on what we did this Wednesday. The only real highlight (or lowlight) was when we went to the nearby Dadar railway station - AKA the most ker-azy place on Earth - to hire a taxi. A couple of likely lads approached and agreed to take us downtown for 200 rupees. But when we got in the taxi, both of them got in, which seemed odd. Plus they seemed a bit young to be taxi drivers. And we drove for about 15 metres before the car was stopped and they turned round and produced a 1,000 rupee note, which they asked us to take in exchange for two 500 rupee notes from our wallets. They didn't even give an explanation as to why they wanted it changed. Are you effin` serious, lads? Do you really think we believe for one second that the note is genuine? It was enough to make me get straight out of the car in a huff and I would have called them some choice names had they pursued us, but they didn't, probably fearing we might call the law if they pushed it. A new scam to add to the Wikitravel website and warn my fellow travellers? It was a new one on me.

It's a shame that's going to be my last recollection of India (pending something going horribly wrong tomorrow!) It's really not India's fault, coming so late in this trip as it has. We've had fun here, there's been plenty of laughs, and the curries have been loads better than you get in Britain. Would I like to come back? Yes, I think I probably would, but in a fresher state, and I'd steer clear of the bigger cities. And I'd steer clear of the hotter curries, just to be safe. I love my madras's, but I wasn't willing to risk it on these fiery shores!

So, The Real World now beckons, and how shall I cope? I suppose the easiest way is to make myself a new Sanity Sheet within this blog, which I can refer to any time I feel a little down in the near future. So here goes...

I will no longer need to be concerned with the following:

* Using a sink to wash my clothes in, including my underwear, then hanging the damp clothes close to where the extractor fan is located and waiting days for them to dry, sometimes using a hairdryer to help the process.
* Using a sink that my brother has washed his clothes in, including his underwear.
* Packing up a suitcase every few days and wondering whether it's going to fall off or out of a bus / train / plane.
* Having a wardrobe consisting of essentially three different outfits.
* Leaving town just as I am starting to make friends with people.
* A lack of decent bacon and mayonnaise sandwiches just like Jimmy makes back home.
* Going months at a time without a bath, and dealing with showers that flow hot and cold, soft and strong whenever they bloody-well feel like it.
* Trying to figure out whether amount A of new foreign currency is a fair price for item B, and whether it will fall apart in my hands as soon as I touch it.
* Watching TV channels with the news in a different language, no decent films, and at least 25 karaoke shows on at any one time.
* A fear of stroking dogs and cats, even if they have the cutest-wutest little "Stroke me!" eyes.
* Remembering to take a little green anti-malarial pill each morning (actually I'll have to keep doing that until the end of January).
* Taking a chance on brand names that I've never heard of and hoping, in the case of, say, deodorant, that it won't burn the skin and come with a Government health warning.
* Getting bitten by bedbugs every time I reckon the hotel bedding is clean enough not to warrant using my sleep sheet.
* Having to plan the next leg of a journey after only having just arrived in a new place.
* Generally only having a bathroom as a place in which I can be alone with my thoughts...and some of those bathrooms would have made Satan himself weep.

I'm such a moaner, aren't I? Well for now it's necessary, because I know that none of the above will be able to make up for the fantastic time I've had on the road. And Tim and I are still just about speaking to each other, which is also good.


So tomorrow it's a flight from Mumbai to Heathrow, then another from Heathrow to Manchester. We'll be travelling all day, but that's how it's often been. That's how we like it...especially when it's my turn for the window seat - bwahahahahar!

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